I'm shagged – literally! We've had sex every day, sometimes twice a day, for the past 10 days and we are so worn out it's actually a struggle for the husband to finish the job. The shag-a-thon would have been shorter as we started on day 12, expecting ovulation to occur on day 14-16 like on the previous Clomid cycles, however thanks to my stupid, unruly ovaries, nothing happened until yesterday. We'll have another go tonight, just to be safe, then we will not be touching each other for at least another 3 weeks!

I think I'm building myself up too much that this cycle will be successful and I know I will be bitterly disappointed if it doesn't work. Now I know my tubes are clear and that I'm ovulating, I can't help thinking it can't fail. However there are other factors at work too, like my acidic CM which means the sperm don't survive for the 3-5 days in the body like it does in other women. Therefore timing is crucial so the sperm can go straight for the egg when it's bobbing down the tube. There is also the husbands poor morphology to contend with (9% instead of 15%). Therefore shagging as much as possible seems like the best idea – keeping me 'topped up' as he calls it!

Due to my late ovulation, my period is now due on the 3rd day of my holiday! We're going on a canal boat for a week with some friends the week after next. The holiday will start on Saturday, and my period is due on the Monday or Tuesday. I'll need to do a test on Saturday morning so as to find out if I can drink that night. If I don't drink, it will raise suspicions. However it might be too early for anything to show up then, so I will have to cut back on the booze anyway, just in case. They will think I'm pregnant even when I might not be! Then there is the period turning up too. It will be difficult for me to enjoy myself when it arrives. I usually spent the day feeling miserable before picking myself up the next day and getting on with it. Perhaps being forced to slap a smile on my face will save me a day of feeling like crap.

After the holiday we're going to a family party for my nan's 90th birthday. My brother and his wife are coming down from Scotland for it. I'm so worried that they will announce a pregnancy! Although I know they need to do it soon as they ain't getting any younger, I know I'll be upset for a little while. It'd be hard because I know my SIL isn't crazy about the idea of having kids. It always seems to happen effortlessly for the women who don't really want it. My mum is worried about this potential situation as she doesn't want me to be upset. But I told her I'd get over it and be really happy for them, which I will. Although hopefully I'll be the one making an announcement at the party!

I really really really hope this time it works.